This is mainly about #Covid19 and pretty much just a reaction to this whole thing, the beginning is just the #revving of the engine before slamming my foot on the gas pedal. Also, again, #writing in the moment, so I’ll pretty much have no clue what you’re talking about, well, some clue, but I won’t really care all that much anymore. Just the way I am.
To the fake Scammers out there!
Best news ever, seriously, the fucking best! You think I wanted this many people trying to get in touch with me? FUCK. NO. Not to mention I haven’t checked my inbox in fucking forever out of a built up #anxiety that the random video calls are going to start up and I’m not picking any of those things up, so if you’ve sent me a message, and I haven’t gotten back to you? That’s why, I literally have a shit ton of people wanting to get to know me, get a free gift card out of me, or get some money over cash app, OR FUCKING PRETENDING TO BE THE OPPOSITE GENDER. I will never understand that, and I’m not talking about Trans peeps, no, I’m talk base level type shit, if you’ve got a picture of a woman, and you’re actually a man, and you fuck up in the first five seconds by using “Am” instead of “I’m”, have your location be in the states but you last checked in be in Nigeria, and your FB link has a different name then your profile, chances are, you’ve screwed up and are blocked before you can even try that bullshit with me. And yes, I’ve not talked about this but I just wanted to get it out of the way, because HOLY SHIT IS IT STILL ON MY MIND, EVEN WITH THE HORSEMAN PESTILENCE TEABAGGING THE SHIT OUT OF HUMANITY. That aside, all love for those trying to get to know me. And no, you’re still not getting my whatsapp. Or Hangouts.
Point being, even to those in the aforementioned “Fuck off” category, wash your hands with soap and water, 20 second scrub sessions, practice social distancing, and if you can’t do that, buy a full body wetsuit, footies as well, a mask, eye protection, and self quarantine. Covid19 is fucking terrifying, and I’m writing this as I’m ten minutes from passing the fuck out from the shift. with more and more cases piling up, the death toll rising, and ventilators being produced faster than beads at the mardi gras celebration, and early phases of trying to get some kind of vaccine out there, there’s still so much we don’t know about this thing, and the fact that conspiracy theorists are shitting themselves because it was a naturally evolved virus, not some jacked up lab experiment set loose upon the world by an angry Newman from Seinfeld gone even more evil and jerky... I just want this thing to go away.
Send the stupid immune cells
I don’t want to catch this thing, I don’t want to have to live the rest of my life with a fucking ventilator strapped to my back like a reverse Darth Vader. because hey, you want to know a fun thing that this little bastard of a virus does? It casts confusion on your immune system and TOTALLY fucks you up from the inside out.That’s right! Your immune system dances with the virus, the virus flat out possesses your white blood cell, and tells it to send out “FUCK EVERYTHING UP!” commands to other white cells, who are in turn infected, and now THEY get to practice social distance, by fucking dive bombing into the infected cells, and release little baby Covids! And the cycle just continues, so thank you Mother Nature you absolute heartless wench for giving birth to something far worse than the asshat who believed that Hot pockets were a great way to spread the Shame, because, hey... hey... I love hot pockets.
To the #nonessentialbusinesses still open
So to those nonessential businesses and young whipper snappers out there licking toilet seats and threatening to cough on Dr. Phil, you stupid little psychos, CLOSE THE FUCK DOWN AND SOCIAL DISTANCE THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME.